What goes up must come down

After such a positive weekend, I'm back to being dragon lady. I'm hoping it's just hormones going up and down too and hope my efforts to lose weight and work out more will help level those pesky rages out. I'm not as bad as I was when I was pregnant, but these past few days definitely haven't been as good as Friday and Saturday.

Tony and I were talking last night and he asked if I was worried about my Dr. appointment Friday. I'm not worried, but still nervous. I want answers why my baby died, but I don't think I'm going to get them. I'm just nervous in general because the last time I was in that office I was devistated. I've been teary the last few days, but I expect that is part hormones, part stress let down. I'm now caught up on correcting and not stressing about home or school anymore.

My dear sweet husband, I love him so much. He told me last night that he wants to help heal my hurts, but can't fix it. He and I have thought about how this miscarriage has changed us. It has helped to heal my marriage. Not that it was really broken, but that close connection between the two of us was gone. Now, after dealing with this and needing each other to get through this, it is better. We talk to each other again, and try to talk things out, not just about the kids. I'm sure we will go through more ups and downs, but in such a time of sorrow and frustration, my marriage is at least doing well.

I worked out again last night, and of course started bleeding again. I need to work out and be active, but I really am tired of bleeding. It's like having the period that never goes completely away! I'll just start to slow up and think it's over, then it starts all over again. It'd be nice not to think or worry about that stuff for at least a few weeks!